If you have had a Bad Date, it’s usually the first date, and that is non-recoverable! Here are a few tips to help you through it and a few confessions of my own!
Bad Date Classifications
1. The Drunk
Oh this is always a fun one but BE CAREFUL. This could be dangerous. Many many moons ago, 6 or 7 years, I had a blind date with a guy who sounded not only gentlemanly but intriguing. We met for dinner but two things turned me off right away 1. He was drunk 2. His drunk friend brought him!
He explained that they had come from a BBQ and was hoping I didn’t mind because, he “figured me for a party type”. Nope. I thought he was very disrespectful and hanging out with drunk people is annoying. I decided I would let it go and hang out a bit. He wasn’t boyfriend material, but he might be an acquaintance… or maybe not.
After a quick dinner, he paid, and we all walked out. His friend went to their truck, and he walked (or staggered) with me to my car. I tried to get in my car and he literally grabbed my arm, angry that I would not make out with him. HELL NO!! Talk about a bad date!
Moral of the story: Drunk people can be dangerous to yourself or others, they may become clingy, angry, or may even pass out leaving you to wonder what to do. My advice, BE CAREFUL and if you need to, make an excuse to leave. This was a very disrespectful first date. No point in trying to save it. Let’s try to find a better possibility!
2. The Shy One
If it’s too quiet on your first date, perhaps it’s time to ask some questions or lead some conversations. Try to remember what they have told you about their kids, their hobbies, their pets. Get them to talk. If your date is shy, do not talk only about yourself and bore them… speaking of which…
3. You’re Bored
Don’t let this happen. If this happens, you may not be a fit match for each other. If you aren’t having an easy time opening up to each other, move your date somewhere else. Go bowling, go play air hockey or maybe even mini golf! Find something fun to do to ease the tension. This person may not be material for your future, but you CAN still make the date fun and maybe at least be friends.
4. There are others
Your date admitted that there are others they are casually dating or that they live with an ex. Good: At least they are upfront right away. Now it’s your turn to decide if you can handle it. Commitment differs from casual dating, so if you are ok with it, go for it. Enjoy life.
I once had a guy, again, many moons ago, who intrigued me. He told me about his ex who he had broken up with 8 months prior. I thought that was enough time to get over it, so I was willing to keep talking to him. After only talking for a month (he lived in another state) I noticed a pattern of when he would call me. I told him I thought he lived with someone. SURE ENOUGH he lived with his EX and didn’t think it was important enough to tell me. Guess who I stopped talking to that very instant?!
Some people are not good at sharing. Some people are not good at honesty. Pick your battles. To me, honesty is more important than my little jealous streak!
5. Love Yourself Especially After a Bad Date
No matter what happens, good or bad, if you don’t love yourself first, how can anyone else love you? if the first date doesn’t work out, or the 5th date doesn’t work, just remember you learned something about yourself, about people, and about dating. Be positive, love yourself, and be Guiltless.